Don't give up on your dreams

So my swim did not go as planned.......but I have to know that there was more to it then just a swim.
The friday night before the race I found out that it was a run/swim. Great you had to run from the start line to a buoy way down on the beach then you do one lap in the sea then get out run to another bouy and then get back into the sea and swim another lap, get out and run to the finish line, well if anyone knows me you would know I can't run. I felt defeated before the day was even on us.

All ended in disaster when the weather reek havoc and the wind was nearly 40 knots the sea was crazy and I just was wondering what am I doing. Megan and I devised a plan that she would be my runner. So I waited by the first buoy and soon Megan came running. Getting into the sea was nearly impossible and I kept being smashed by the waves. I kept trying i probably swallowed more sea water then a should have and I wanted to give up, Megan my dear friend kept saying come on Cath you nearly out of the waves and to the first buoy. After a mean fight to get to the first buoy, I was told to get out of the water :(

I walked away feeling a lot of stuff and spent the day wading through my head.
But lets leave it with this song from Rod Stewart -

ROD STEWART
"Never Give Up On A Dream"

(Rod Stewart, Bernie Taupin / Jim Cregan)

If there's doubt and you're cold,
don't you worry what the future holds.
We've gotta have heroes to teach us all
to never give up on a dream.

Claim the road, touch the sun,
no force on earth could stop you run.
When your heart bursts like the sun
never never give up on a dream.

Shadows fall, daylight dies,
freedom never got a place to hide.
Search forever photo finish line
but never give up on your dream.

Crazy notions fill your head,
you gotta break all the records set.
Push yourself until the end
but don't you ever give up on your dream.

Now listen to me
you don't need no restrictions yeah
Oh, sing it again
you can't live on sympathy.
You just need to go the distance,
oh the distance
that's all you need to be free,
to be free, to be free, to be free.

Sing a song for me children
you don't need no restrictions yeah
you can't live on sympathy.
You just need to go the distance,
that's all you need to be free,

Now listen to me!
Inspiring all to never lose,
it'll take a long long time before they fill your shoes
it'll take somebody, somebody, who's lot like you
who never gave up on a dream.
No, you never gave up on a dream
no, you never gave up on a dream.

You never, never, never,
never gave up on a dream.

Where I am at!

This year has flown by and I find myself wondering what happened to it many times. I feel in some ways I have not made the progress I wanted to, considering I missed my date for wanting to be on top of the mountain, but I have to use Gods date, that way I probably will be in line with what He is doing.

I realised that if I set goals to reach for then the mountain will not be as big as it seems right now. So I entered a swimming competition, I am so excited about this. Its time to start pulling my love for sport out of the grave yard, and let it live again.

I was attending this church and they have been planning this sporting event. its called the Anchor Challenge on the 11th December. Its a four part event, Moutain bike25km, running12km, swimming1.5km and kayaking10km. http://www.anchorchallenge.co.za/

No I am not doing all of them. Dont plan on killing myself. I am opting for the swim. I rounded up a team and we are called "The Players".
I had to laugh because when I told some people they heard I would be swimming in the sea. The beach is known for its sharks. Nice so we get to swim with the sharks!
So now I am training, as I type type this my arms are a bit tired. I was up at 6am this morning heading to the gym to do a 1.5km swim in the pool!

I have set this as a stepping stone to the big mountain. Its getting me out of my bad fitness level and its a small goal towards the bigger one. I have realised I work better with small goals leading me to the bigger goal. It helps me get up at 6am to go swim knowing that in 3 weeks time I have to do this race.
Its also pulling out a deep passion that has been dying!

Find that small goal and reach for the big one, find that dying passion and get it sparked again!
Live for the now, it is what counts!

Love
Cath

Going Around!

More and more I find myself being drawn to adventure and something that will push me to the limits! And I find people who enjoy the same thing and then try make sure I either 'read" their book or follow what they are up to online.

Once such person is a guy who firstly road around Africa on his bicycle and now has circled Madagascar on his kayak. His name is Riaan Manser. I came across his book on Africa a few years ago, a few days ago I attended his book launch of his new book "Around Madagascar on my kayak".

Riaan signing a copy of his book

It was great, he is an amazing humble guy and left me feeling excited about my adventure.

Catherine and Riaan

With one good leg, US veterans climb Mount Kilimanjaro

The climb proved perilous for the men who struggled for purchase on Mt Kilimanjaro's loose rock and scree paths

Three US amputee veterans have climbed Mt Kilimanjaro, enduring tumbles and sores to reach Africa's highest peak with only one good leg among them.

The veterans - of Vietnam, Afghanistan and Iraq - hiked to the top of the 5,891m (19,330ft) high Tanzanian mountain in six days to show that disability need not lead to inactivity.

The trip typically takes five or six days, and the men had to stop frequently to adjust their titanium prosthetic legs, as they slipped constantly on the loose scree-covered paths.

At 26, Neil Duncan of Colorado, who lost his legs in Afghanistan, was the youngest of the trio The hikers were Dan Nevins, 37, who lost his legs in Iraq; Neil Duncan, 26, who lost both legs in a roadside bomb attack in Afghanistan in 2005; and Kirk Bauer, 62, who lost a leg in Vietnam in 1969.

"If three amputees from three different wars and two different generations with literally one good leg can climb Kilimanjaro, our other disabled friends can get out and go hiking or go biking or swim a mile, can get out and lead a healthy life," Mr Bauer told the Associated Press news agency.

Mr Nevins developed a bad sore on one of his stumps and after reaching the peak was evacuated on a wheeled stretcher.

see more pictures http://www.reedhoffmann.com/Kili2010/index.html

Mr Bauer is executive director of Disabled Sports USA, a Washington DC-area organisation that promotes physical fitness and sport participation for individuals with disabilities.

Head First

"It is because they have so much to give and give it so lavishly..that men love the mountains and go back to them again and again" Sir Fracis Younghusband

This must be me, you would think after the amount of times I have fallen that I would not go back and hike but for some reason I keep going back for more, and more I get!
I am in slight pain today as yesterday Megan, Nithasha, Terri, her 3 friends, My dog Jessy and of course me went walking in Cecilia Forest.

I was tired yesterday and did ot feel like walking, I had to push my thoughts and my body aside and concentrate on moving up the mountain. After about 10 minutes I found my rythym and slowly we got up the first few hills of our walk. I had decided that walking on the big jeep tracks was good but I needed to walk on the more harder places as easy walking is not going to cut it for me, we need some challenges. The amazig thing is that the harder tracks are getting easier which does mean my walking is improving, Megan can vouch for that, its a process of walking past my mind and seeing what is ahead.
We had to turn around eventually as it was gettig late and we still had to make our way back to the car, but deep down I wanted to walk on and on and on.......

Heading back down was a head first experience. Megan and myself were just strolling along this little single track with lots of rocks, the next thing I knew I was sliding down the side of the mountain head first into more rocks below me. Somehow my trekking pole had lodge itself into the sides of where I was falling and I held onto that which saved ,me from a head on collision with the rocks below.

Megan hauls me up onto the path and in true Cath style, she kind of just sits there for a while on the path and eventually gets up and keeps walking, Megan was wondering whether she should take some lessons in how to pull Cath out of situations like that. We had a good laugh about it, but I guess it could have been more serious if I had fallen further.

We still had a way to walk to get to the car but on we pioneered, through the pains in my calf and my shin, we eventually made it to the car. It was encouraging because even though I was sore and finding it hard to walk, I still kept up my training in walking like I am suppose to walk. I think my brain was on over drive!!!

I was relieved when we got to the car, yet sad that I had to leave the mountain, the mountain has grown on me in ways unbelivable and all I want to do now is climb. I have been reading a book..."Facing Up" Bear Gylls and he sums it for me in one part of the book. The book is about him climbing Everest. He had broken his back in 3 places 2 years earlier.

"That evening talking with Scott, he told of the years of preparation he had done for this climb. Being out here, seeing the mountain but with a weak ankle, his ambition now was just to get to the Western Cwm. That was all he wanted. I felt humbled. Why was I aiming for the summit? Scott was training for this climb while I was still at school, yet he is only hoping to reach the Western Cwm. Maybe I was reaching to high. This troubled me that evening as I sat alone in my tent. But I knew that I had to stretch myself further and reach beyond my grasp. I felt this burning urge to go higher and I longed to witness the summit. The beauty of the places on the way there was unquestioned - what I had seen so far had stunned me in its sheer scale and beauty, but I felt there was more. My eyes and heart were for the summit and my dream was to reach it with the Person who had created it. I wanted this to be my journey" 

My eyes and heart are for the summit of Kilimanjaro and my dream is to reach it with the Person who created it. The amazing thing is I am reaching summits of different places in my life not just physical mountains and Jesus is with me! God is teaching me through my physical moutain walks what spiritual moutain walks are and how to walk them till you reach the summit!

Love
Cath

Space between your DREAMS

" Dont be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality, if you can dream it you can make it so" Belva Davis

I go through these stages of writting and then not writting, of dreaming and then not dreaming, of walking and then dragging my feet. Constantly feeling the space between my dreams and the reality I face each day. My mind is what stops my dreams. I could not really care about what my body is saying at the moment, it has not earned any points in this conversation as yet. So what am I doing at the moment? Contending for my dream in that space of reality!!!

What a place to be especially when I feel the full force of reality constantly pulling at my heels.. BUT what have I learnt about dreaming in this space? Well for one....
- When we don't dream we die.
- The dreams in my heart are Gods dream because I am His dream :)

There are times when our dreams happen without us having to do much and then there are dreams which push us to our limits. In both of these situations it should bring out our determination, our perseverance and most of all what do we believe.

In all of this the one question or not really a question but a challenge, "How BIG is your God", which should make you ask the question " How BIG is your dream"

Remember don't put God into your dream, put your dream into God, that way when you might feel your dream is to big, remember how big your God is.

"but the plans of the Lord stand firm for ever, the purposes of His heart through all generations" Psalm 33:11

One dream, one step, one life, one decision

Today as I woke up, my body was stiff and sore. I had walked the mountains yesterday for only 3,5 hours, yet it felt like I had walked the whole day.
But here is the thing, it takes twice and sometimes 3 times the effort then normal, why you wonder, well I am having to retrain my legs to walk and in the process re train my mind on how to tell my legs how to walk.

Its one thing to just get up and walk automatically, but if I do that my legs from the same pattern they had for nearly 30 years. So here I am breaking 30 years of incorrect walking. This is hard work. And today I felt muscles in me that I did not know existed. This is exciting yet in so many ways really hard. There were times when we were walking that I just felt like falling back into my old way but as I would do that, I would feel myself fighting not to go back to the old. And then of course Megan caught on and noticed the difference and then when she saw me reverting back to my old walk she would tell me and stop me and then we would begin all over again.

Its so true how our minds can control how we think, function and dream. I have had a dream to climb a mountain for long now, I have made a decision to do it, I have one life to do it in and I will take one step at a time to get there no matter what. Even if it means I spend 3,5 hours walking in a circle saying to myself constantly “ heel toe, heel toe, heel toe”.
And praise God I only fell once; this was a record in so many ways. It was kind of sore but the best thing to do when you fall down is to get back up and keep going. Great lesson to learn in life. So for those of you reading this, I dare you to go for a dream you have had, and even though you might have fallen a few times, just get up, dust yourself off and keep going.
I have been reading this book. Its called “Holding On, Jo Gambi” its about a couple who climbed the seven summits. The husband was in remission after two bouts of cancer when they did it. It’s an incredible story. But there is this part, which I loved and thought it would be good to share, as it’s about pushing through our minds and dreaming even when we feel its impossible. Enjoy it………….


“ Thirty minutes out of high camp I had reached the rock bands but felt panicky. My breathing was still frenzied, I had found no rhythm since leaving high camp and now I had to climb. I slid my ascender up and scrabbled for purchase on the snow-covered rock. Even my first few moves left me limp. Groaning inside my mask I fought every move, then hung my harness, unable to lift hand or foot. Devoid of strength, my legs were shaking and hauling my weight up with my arms was agonizing. I forced myself upwards once more and sank back in my harness again. I fumbled to adjust my goggles and mask but with clumsy mitten hands I had just made things worse. Thoughts screamed inside my head. “This is not possible. Its too hard, I have reached my limit.”

Russell’s words that Cho Oyu was just a game compared to Everest reverberated inside my dulled mind, taunting me. “If Everest is harder then this – its inconceivable, impossible it will kill me for sure. There is no way I am doing Everest” my mind raced in a blur of unanswered questions and declarations. I was about to expire with the effort. I had never given up in my life, yet even in my state of high altitude oblivion I felt strangely relieved to have made the decision. Saying no to Everest, I felt as if I had come to my senses. I had discovered my limits and I could finally be at peace.

As my mind had been working, my body had continued robotically clawing its way up the rock. With each desperate move I was still gaining height and the long feared rock band was passing beneath me. Bracing myself against the steep snow, I was breathing so fast my throat felt narrowed to a crack and my rib muscles burned with the effort.

‘Sorry Loppasang,’ I gasped, ‘rest here, please’
“Ok,’ he replied. Loppasang was breathing hard too behind his oxygen mask, but his presence was calming. Looking around I decided this was a safe place to turn back. “I could give up now and stop all this pain. Yes this is a good place to halt this nonsense before its too late.’ But as if reading my mind, Loppasang breathlessly announced, “climb now better, Didi.’ Before my brain could even engage, his comment rekindle a fire inside me. My heart surged with excitement and within seconds my mind had leapt over an abyss. I’d never felt so utterly incapable of taking another step, yet I was doing just that. In my abject weakness, primitive desire had kept me going through the torturous rock bands and now I was ready to push for the summit. Nothing was going to turn me around. ………..

Nearing the summit plateau, our team had split up. Rob had pulled ahead with a renewed determination in his step. I was 50 meters behind and the others were out of sight. The summit was just half a kilometer away, though it would take an hour to reach. My steps remained painfully slow but my mind had changed gear. After all the doubts and questioning, it finally felt like we were going to get there.
Then at 9am, after nearly six weeks of struggling, I had finally arrived at the prayer flags marking the summit of Cho Oyu. Falling on my knees I rested motionless for what seemed like an eternity.

Heading back to Advance Base Camp the following morning, just hours after feeling at deaths door, and the most peculiar and uninvited thoughts popped up on the screen of my mind. “Well you managed Cho Oyu, so why not Everest?” I could not believe my thoughts, let alone comprehend them. Could something inside me really be contemplating Everest? How could the slate of my memory be wiped clean, and so soon?

Over the following days we returned to base camp and finally started our journey home to Katmandu. As we waited at the border post the subject of Everest came up with Russell. In his familiarly blunt style he gave us his verdict. “Your rope work and technical skills are solid, you’re good in the team and you’ve managed to climb above 8000 meter, but” he paused to look at us, ‘if you’re going to stand a chance with Everest, you’ve got to really want it.’
Looking at each other, we already knew the answer. Rob drew in his breath,’ yes we really want to climb it.” Russell looked at me as I nodded in full agreement and that was it. We had finally declared that we wanted to climb Everest. For the first time our dream had become a tangible possibility.

“Great, it will be fantastic having you guys along. I will put you down for the 2004 team,’ Russell said with a broad smile. ‘Of course, I don’t know if you’ve got what it takes to summit Everest, but if you are successful, I promise it will change your lives forever.”

PLAYING up the Mountain

So yesterday we (Megan and I) saw our trainer (Gavin) for our fitness program.

We dragged our feet there as both of us had, had a long day and it was hot. But we knew this was good for us and if we need to climb a mountain we need to get over our tired little bodies.

For some who don’t know me, here is some body break down so you can see this is not just some easy thing. I have a form of Spastic paralysis in my legs; this form of paralysis is the part of the nervous system that controls coordinated movement of the voluntary muscles is disabled. In spastic paralysis the nerves controlling muscle movement are hyperirritable and do not function in a coordinated manner, so that impulses from them cause spasmodic muscle contraction. Doctors tell me I should have been in a wheel chair, I say burn the wheel chair 

I don’t have much balance and my legs are “lazy” as Gavin put it. And my hands are my training wheels. I like using my hands to coordinate my walking and this in turn makes my legs even more lazy, believe it or not.

So this journey is more then just a walk up a mountain it’s a serious overcoming of my legs that actually don’t want to work. What’s been interesting is I have felt small changes and even Gavin noticed in some of my movements since we last saw him which was about 3 weeks ago. And this was just from me taking small little habits that I have had for years and changing them. For instance when I stand up, I do it incorrectly. So he showed me how to stand up properly and now I don’t have back ache anymore. And climbing stairs, I usually will move my leg in a circular way to get up the stair but now I have been making a point of moving my leg straight up. These are small little things that have made a huge difference.

It’s that one step at a time thing, we all want to climb huge mountains one day, live out our dreams and fulfill what we have been given to do, but it starts with a step and sometimes a big mind change. I see that in my training.

So for the next 6 weeks I am going to be playing on a ball. Yes, we consider training playing, so we all love to play, so I love to train.
By my playing I will be developing my core and stability of my body that does not exist.
Just think of this in the spirit. And you can in so many ways see how our bodies can sometimes dictate how we react and relate to ourselves but also to others.

Lets keep playing…………………..

2 Pairs 4 Feet!

4 feet that belong to these 2 faces, will be walking many miles in pursuit of a dream, but not just one dream, its for many people that have dreams but need to see that they can achieve them no matter what. Its believing that what ever you put your heart to can be done.
I guess you wondering what we are up to right.
My dream has been to climb Mount Kilimanjaro, this year we will be doing it. Nothing will stop me from climbing a mountain that Peeps out at Africa.

On Saturday 30 January 2010 we had our first meeting with our personal trainer, who says "His job is to get me up, my job is to walk". And this was my favorite part, He said "I get to play and have fun" Wow, how else to view this entire journey. Playing and having fun on a mountain :)

Watch this space...........for more information and feedback on this journey!

GREEN FOOD :)

Supporting my body for this journey is key, so am starting with some nutritional green stufff...........

"WHAT IT IS - Barley grass (Hordeum vulgare) is the seedling of the barley plant. It is usually harvested about 200 days after germination, when the shoots are less than a foot tall.

NUTRITIONAL VALUE - A concentrated source of nearly three dozen vitamins and minerals, barley grass is particularly rich in vitamins A, C, B1, B2, folic acid, and B12; calcium; iron; potassium; and chlorophyll. Unlike most plants, barley grass provides all nine essential amino acids (those which your body can't produce)."

The first steps are.........

I guess today was a day to remember in the sense that, it was a step again in the direction of this dream I get to live out.
I spoke to someone who is willing to help me walk this dream out. He is as excited as I am! It was a feeling of "wow this could actually work" and "what am I thinking"

But the more I ponder it the more my heart races for the challenge and the more I realise nothing is out of reach if we put our minds and our hearts to it!

Watch this space as you journey with me to the top of a mountain!

Adventure on the Edge

" There is equally little doubt that mountaineering today takes what it has always taken: Courage, the ability to endure and the triumph of the mind. It is a curious fact, I think that the real beauty, drama and interest of mountaineering is not the mountains themselves, not even the physical aspect of their conquest but what goes on in the mind of men and woman who climb the far peaks. No- one sees further, clearer, deeper than those whose life is hanging by fingertips on the edge of the abyss" - Jon E Lewis.